So, like any “infatuation period”, all good things must come to an end. Or moreso must come to a “taper-off” point. I definitely believe I have reached that point living in Spain. Don’t get me wrong, I still love San Sebastian and I’m excited to be here and I still know I’m so lucky to be living here and have the situation that I have, so please don’t think, “Oh Boo-hoo BreAnn, you are living in Spain, shut up.” But it just seems like bad things keep happening lately, and it’s frustrating! Anyway… So just like that first “infatuation period” in a new, exciting relationship, or when you are in the “honeymoon phase” after getting married, there comes a point where things wear off a bit and everything becomes a little more monotonous. You get into a daily routine, time starts to fly by, and things are less exciting than they used to be.
And, in general, it feels like nothing can go RIGHT lately for me!
Sorry for the “bitch session” but let’s just go over my quickie list of annoying things that have been piling up the last month:
**Well, you’ve already read in my last two blogs about all the crappy traveling BS I had to go through. Between barely making buses, and being denied from getting on a plane, running around cities, and missing buses, forking out ridiculous amounts of money to bail myself out of horrible situatons, I’ve just had it! And YES I know I’m lucky to have gone to Barcelona and Rome I KNOW THAT, but it’s just exhausting and frustrating when you can’t go one place without there being some new headache.
**I’ve probably visited about 15 cellphone stores (not exaggerating) all over the city trying to find a damn cellphone that I can check my email on (need it for work) – well, in Spain that’s virtually impossible without a 18-24 month contract, and it’s been very difficult for me to commit to a phone until I know EXACTLY what I’m getting myself into, and be able to understand exactly. Nobody at any of these stores has been able to speak good english, and it becomes somewhat difficult to expain to them exactly what I need and what my situation is in Spanish. Oh yea, and have I mentioned yet just how RIDICULOUSLY expensive cell-phone talk-time is here? Probably average is like 20-50 cents per minute, and I think like 50 cents per text message. At least the one good thing here is you don’t get charged for calls or text messages from other people… you only pay for outgoing.
**I’m still dealing with BS for my Visa. After ALL the damn run-around in the US to get here, turns out they only gave me 3 damn months on my Visa and I needed to go to the police station once I got to Spain to extend the term to the 7 months I WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE anyway. Long story short, I’ve already been to the police station twice, and all over the damn city collecting more stupid papers. I’ve had to go to the city hall like 3 times now, and needed more copies of this, that, and whatever. I feel like should photocopy my butt and just throw that one in the stack of papers for fun. Write something on the photocopy like, “This is what I think about your country for making me go through all this BS.” Haha. Horrible, I know.
**The roomies are still nice guys I love to talk to, etc, . . . but I’m starting to feel like an unappreciated mother sometimes. I clean the apartment every weekend and sometimes more–like a FULL cleaning, scrub down every room, vacume everything–and as soon as they return Sunday night, there is food on the table, floor, living room floor, couch, and there is ALWAYS spattered oil all over the stove, and the only frying pan is sitting on the stove with a 1/2 inch of used and re-used oil in it. Gross. So if I ever want to use the frying pan I need to dump out the disgusting used-and-reused oil and wash it myself first. Oh yea, and like most men, they don’t understand how VITAL it is for a woman to REPLACE THE DAMN TOILET PAPER ROLL when it runs out. I don’t appreciate doing the “bunny hop” at least once a week across the bathroom in search for a new roll of TP. OH! And also, my birthday is on Monday and a bunch of people are coming out Saturday for a little fiesta at the bars, and my roomie, Dani, had planned for over a month now to actually stay in town to come out with me,,, and I’ve been SUPER excited about that for awhile. Well, all of a sudden this week he tells me he’s not coming anymore and acts like it’s not a big deal. And I’m actually VERY upset about it, but I’m guessing he probably didn’t understand how much it meant to me. Ugh.
**Sonny seems to not have learned the fact that IT IS NOT OK TO PEE IN THE HOUSE. Despite the fact I have a potty pad down at all times, and now I normally keep him locked in only my room when I’m gone for the day, he still manages to once-or-twice-weekly sneak off and pee on the front rug or in the hallway. Of course he INSTANTLY starts shaking and is upset because he knows he did wrong… so then it’s like well WHY DID YOU DO IT IN THE FIRST PLACE THEN??? Damn dog!!
**My bit** of a landlord back in LA decided to try to scam us out of SIX HUNDRED AND FIFTY DOLLARS from our security deposit for “new paint and cleaning” after we moved out. WTF???? We only lived in that dump 10 months and took great care of it, and I have NEVER had money taken out of my security deposit for ANY other apartment I’ve lived in… even the one I was in for 4 years.
**I got an MRI done in December on my wrist which I found out later was COMPLETELY UNNECCESSARY. Regardless, my insurance company was supposed to cover the amount after I paid my $500 deductible (which I thought was already astronomical), but instead I just recieved a bill last week for OVER $1,000.00. Bastards!
**The guy I had a little crush on at school that always flirts with me told me he’s gay. I still don’t believe him, and neither does anybody I tell, but yet I’m still intrigued by him and wonder if he’s lying and why he would be, and it drives me absolutely crazy all the time, even though I don’t care all that much or know why I even wonder. I think that was probably his plan…
**The other guy I have a crush on that I thought liked me just told me 2 weeks ago he got back together with his ex. He seems to think it’s not a big deal to always tell me when he’s hung out with her. Barf!
**After dealing with a nightmare-ish computer crash, and then 3 following weeks of computer-program-hell and a ton more issues, my laptop suddenly gets this mysterious crack in the plastic part of the lid… and NOW the past week or so I’ve been getting THE BLUE-SCREEN-ERROR-OF-DEATH every other day or so. COME ON!!! WHAT THE HECK?? I didnt drop this kind of money on a laptop to have all this hassle!! 🙁
**My classes have been SO HARD the past month or so. I’ve been pissed off for weeks because the first 2 weeks were great intro info and helpful things and I really enjoyed learning. Suddenly week 3 begins and we have a bunch of new students and we are launched into the more-advanced class and they are teaching us past, present, and future tenses of verbs I don’t even know the meanings of yet. It’s frustrating especially because I’m paying a lot for these classes, and it shouldn’t be MY problem if they need to combine the beginner class with the higher-up class because they don’t have the professors for it. Most mornings I get so pissed off about it that I find myself not wanting to learn because I’m frustrated with yet ANOTHER frikking verb tense they want to teach us. For example, do you know just how MANY ways there are to say the word “go” or “went” in Spanish?
Let’s see… verb “to go”: ir
I go/she goes/they go, etc: voy, va, vas, vamos, vais, van
I went/she went, etc: fue, fui, fuimos, fueron
I am going/she is going, they, etc, future: voy a ir, va a ir, vas a ir, vamos a ir, vais a ir, van a ir
Another future tense for “go”: iré irás, irá, iremos, iréis, irán
Conditional tense for “go”: iría, irías, iríamos, iríais, irían
Hmmm, I think that’s about it? I’m probably missing more. Yep, those are ALL words that mean I go/went or you/they/she/you guys/we went/go. And that’s just ONE VERB out of the thousands that there are. Sheesh! Can you understand my frustration?
**And of course, in general I’m a bit annoyed with Spain. In the beginning, I just “rolled with it” . . . and don’t get me wrong, I still am. But the beginning charm of, “It’s just part of the new experience and new country,” has worn off, and I find myself cursing out loud many times per day when I want to go to a store or government building and it’s closed. Or I don’t get my butt outta bed on time on Saturday in order to get to the grocery store before it closes for the day and all day Sunday and then I’m left eating whatever I can scrounge up from the refrigerator or cabinet.
Oh yea, and when I go out to the bars, or even restaurants, I DREAD having to use the bathroom because you NEVER know what you’re in for. Will there be toilet paper? Soap? A toilet seat? Sometimes there are none of the above. Paper towels in a bathroom is a luxury to me now. And because of this, I have to say I’m actually really enjoying the whole European “double kiss” as the greeting (instead of shaking hands) when you meet somebody or say goodbye to a friend… because I definitely DON’T want to touch anybody’s hand because I can’t imagine just HOW MUCH disgusting bacteria must be on it! Hah!
SIGH. Oh well. It’s all part of the experience I know. And I know that tomorrow I’ll be fine again. Even when I’m upset or frustrated or whatever it may be, I never let it enter my mind for too long or let it fester. And I’m actually very pleased that in general I haven’t really been sad or upset or lonely since I’ve arrived and I’ve been very happy and often enjoy every minute of every hour of every day (or at least try to!)
But I just needed to take a moment out of my day to write down the frustrations in my life right now that have been building up. Thanks for listening! 🙂